Saturday, April 30, 2016





Where would we be today without all those pearls of mothering wisdom, passed down through the ages from mothers to their children, and from our moms to us? Just in time for Mother's Day, in honor of all the times our moms have shared their advice and tried to help us be better people, we've recollected, collected and collated all their motherly sayings into a gigantic list o' momisms...

Enjoy some of these fun sayings.........

From the predicable Mom

  Eat your vegetables, they're good for you.
- I can always tell when you're lying.
- If God had wanted you to have holes in your ears (… tongue, eyebrows...) He would have put them there!
- If you could stay out last night, you can get up this morning.
- If you're too full to finish your dinner, you're too full for dessert.
- If you're too sick to go to school, you're too sick to play outside.
- When you have kids of your own you'll understand.
- When you have your own house then you can make the rules!
- It's no use crying over spilt milk.
- You won't be happy until you break that, will you?
- Beds are NOT made for jumping on.
- Cupcakes are NOT a breakfast food!
- Go play outside! It's a beautiful day!
- Always wear clean underwear in case you get in an accident.
- If you don't learn how to cook, no one is going to want to marry you.
- You're the oldest. You should know better.
- You can't find it? Well, where did you leave it last?
- Someone is going to end up crying.
- Go to your room and think about what you did!
- The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
- When I was a little girl...

-When mom seems confused
  Who do you think you are?
- Who do you think you're talking to?
- Do you think I'm made of money?
- Who said life was going to be easy?
- Am I talking to a brick wall?
- All I do is follow you around, picking up after you like some maid.
- A little "birdy" told me!
- I'm not your cleaning lady!
- I'm not your maid!
- I'm not your waitress!
- No child of MINE would do something like that.
- Stop acting like your father!
- What did I say the FIRST time?
- At work my mind's on the children, at home I think of the office.
- You’re just like your father.
- Are you deaf or something?
- What part of NO don't you understand?
   
Surely you ( mom ) must be exaggerating!
Eat everything on your plate. There are starving children all over the world who would be glad to trade places with you.
- How can you have nothing to wear? Your closet is FULL of clothes!
- Don't break your arm patting yourself on the back.
- If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times.
- Life isn't fair.
- Look at this room! It looks like a pigsty!
- There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do.
- There's enough dirt in those ears to grow potatoes!
- This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.
- Turn off that light. Do you think we own the electric company?
- Well, people in Hell want ice water too!
- When I was young we had respect for our elders, now look at the world!
- When I was your age, I had to walk ten miles through the snow, uphill, by myself, to go to school.
- You kids are trying to drive me crazy!
- You'd forget your head if it wasn't attached to your shoulders!
- A little soap and water never killed anybody.
- Bored! How can you be bored? I was never bored at your age.
- Close the door! You don't live in a barn.
- You should have that phone surgically implanted in your ear.
- Do you live to annoy me?
- If wishes were horses...
- Well, I haven't figured out how to cook "cold" yet.
I think Mom is being a little picky.

I said CLOSE the door, I did not say SLAM it.
- I'll treat you like an adult when you start acting like one.
- Don't pick your nose in public.
- Don't put that in your mouth, you don't know where it's been.
- Don't use that tone with me!
- Don't walk away when I'm talking to you!
- Don't you have anything better to do?
- Are you going out dressed like that?
- Don't run with a lollipop in your mouth.
- I don't know is NOT an answer.
- If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.
- Look at me when I'm talking to you.
- Now, come back downstairs and go back up WITHOUT stomping your feet!
- Now, say you're sorry...and MEAN it!
- Say please.
- Turn that racket down!
- Watch your mouth!
- What kind of a grade is that? You could do much better!
- You can go out to play...after you brush your teeth and comb your hair.
- You can go out to play...after you pick up your room.
- You can go out to play...after you've done your homework.
- You just ate an hour ago!
- I don't care what


Do Mom's make threats?

Do not make that face or it will freeze in that position.
- Don't eat that, you'll get worms!
- Don't go out with a wet head, you'll catch cold.
- Don't EVER let me catch you doing that again!
- Don't pick that scab, it'll get infected.
- Be careful or you will put your eye out.
- I brought you into this world, and I can take you right back out!
- If I catch you doing that one more time, I'll...
- If it were a snake, it would have bitten you.
- If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.
- Don't sit too close to the television, it'll ruin your eyes.
- If you don't clean your plate, you won't get any dessert.
- If you stick your tongue out again it will fall off.
- If you don't stop crying, I'm going to give you something to cry about!

What did we miss???
   Remember a momisms? Tell us

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